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I feel so badly about ignoring Evan all this time. I mean, to be perfectly honest, it felt good for a while. I thought that I was paying him back... For what? I can't even think of it now... I don't even know if there ever was something that he did that caused me to be so cruel to him. It still bothers me that he doesn't come up to me and ask, "What's wrong? Why are you being such a brat?" I'd love it if he did that. Then I'd know he still knew I existed! But still, I know that the way I have been behaving has absolutely NOT been "what Jesus would do." So... I am going to try my hardest to make amends with him tomorrow. Before the weekend begins...

But, besides Evan, another sad thing has occurred in my life. My ART teacher, Mrs. Saad, has left. She is officially gone as of today and we all cried, and laughed, and shared a slice of cake and punch, but I knew that inside my chest, my heart was breaking. I couldn't even speak. How can she leave? We love her so much here. Too much... She's kicking off her retirement with a trip to Mexico-- I'm so happy for her. I know she'll bargain with the basket weavers and hunt for cheap pieces of art and pottery that she will try to replicate when she gets home. She treasures the most odd things, especially the things she buys at garage sales, because she knows that at one point in time, that something was precious to somebody else... So precious that they actually spent money for the thing. That's the Mrs. Saad outlook on life: All things, living and nonliving, is beautiful in one way or another. Wow, I'm going to miss her. She brought out the most beautiful side in me. She brought out the best of my work. She helped create a better me.

I love Mrs. Saad. And I told her so. On her "Good-bye" card, I wrote that God loved her and that I did too. Then I hugged her and told her that things would not be the same without her and that I did not see myself doing nearly as good of artwork as when she was my teacher. She told me otherwise, as I expected her to do... And that's why I love her.


carly bishop.
O me, O my... Where has all the time gone?
Well, I don't exactly have a good excuse for not writing for so long... Simply because I have not felt inspired, I guess. I will try harder, but there are no guarantees!

Today was not exactly inspirational or fun, but it did have its plus points. Spring is in the air here in the Northwest and I am thoroughly enjoying the sunny weather with the crisp winter breeze always running through my hair. Sorry, I felt poetic. Anyways, my friends and I love sitting on top of my car each day for lunch, jamming on guitars, and listening to stoopid songs playing on the radio... something about a guy wishing to see his girlfriend's naked body-- ok, well, it's funny when you're actually there!

I have recently dedicated my physical health to Weight Watchers and have lost 13.6 pounds. Yay! Go me! I am pretty for 18-20 pounds by March 15 because that is when I leave for Florida with my second family. I want to feel good in a bathing suit and I want to get an awesome tan for when I go to Creation Fest this summer at the Gorge. I'm thinking about getting my hair braided again for that occasion... I'm just concerned with the pain that it takes to go through with it. O the pain!... But I will not dwell on the negatives.

I am in a somewhat pleasant mood because (1) it is late, and (2) I watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory with my two favorite kids in the world. "We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams..." and furthermore, "Help... Police... Murder." What a wonderful show. I hope my mind always stays that young and immature, but contains the normal amount of knowledge as any other 18 year old. Ah yes, I am 18 now. Just turned. Well, not just, but fairly recent, indeed. January 16 was that special day... Technically, I am an adult, but I am so glad I don't feel like one! I still feel like I'm 13, which is excellent, I think I'll last longer in this world...

Anyways, I thought I'd drop in a few lines because of how stoopidly lazy I have been... How sad I must make people. Not really, I doubt anyone really reads any of this stuff. Ah well, no biggie. Late, my fellow jeffersair Passengers.

*intercom static* Hello, this is your lazy captain speaking: Do you know how much God loves you? I do.


carly.