Senior Ceremonies are the Pits
Ok, so this blog hasn't exactly been the most interesting to read lately... I'm SORRY!!! It's just that I've been so busy and my classes are getting harder, and... Well, you know how it is!
So, I'm kinda sticking to the downlow at the moment due to the fact that senior ceremonies for school are drawing nearer and I literally want to stay invisible in the whole mess. Prom is on June 1st and obviously, I won't be attending. Even if someone did ask me to go, it would be mass too late to buy a dress and have all the preparations and there's no way that I am going to the prom by myself. No way! Honestly, I don't really wanna go, but I can't help but feel a little bad because I know my kids are gonna ask me one day what prom was like, (just like I asked my parents), and they're going to be so bummed when I tell them I didn't go! (Just like I was disappointed to know that neither of my parents went!) So... besides that, it's kinda a good thing that I am not going, because the whole thing is rather depressing to me. I'm not dating anyone and none of my guy friends want to take me and the fact that I look terrible in a dress doesn't exactly lift my spirits either. And then of course, there's the senior graduation ceremony which I've heard is one of the most boring experiences ever! And I'll be totally honest, one of the things I hate the absolute most is sitting, doing nothing, and looking at the clock every other second to see if it's "almost over" yet. I hate that!!! It's the worst! Bordome sucks... It really, really sucks...

Anyways, I haven't anything meaningful to say at the moment.
I guess, the only thing that I can think of is something that has been etched in my mind since Saturday, and it's this:

May the Force be with you....


jeffersonair.

Oh my... I had quite the weekend. Saturday I saw Star Wars. It was quite awesome. Of course, I couldn't stand Anikan, or however you spell his name. He was the whiniest, baby-ish person I have ever seen in a movie! And... well, I'll have to go into Sunday later. Because now I have to go to class.


Peace.

My sister is home from school with her fiance and so far, it's been pretty good. Some intense moments, but for the most part, pretty nice. I've missed them. Cassie and Sol are really funny together. They are like a comedy-duo and have me laughing myself to tears most of the time that I am with them.

But if you read this, please pray for my sister and I. We tend not to get along very well when she is home for a long time. We rub against each other, if you know what I mean. She is sharing my room and that, in itself, can be a very touchy subject. So yeah, please pray. Thanks!

peace out, passengers.
carly.

Dude! I don't have a lot to say today. I did stuff, and I'll probably go into details later, but for now, I just want to mention this:

Christians In Crisis--Please! Become one of the 500,000 intercessors praying for our brothers and sisters in Christ who are persecuted every day!!! We cannot forget the things they are doing in the name of Jesus Christ! Pray for them whever you can! Thank you! Tell anyone who may be interested in praying. God is awlays listening to your prayers--it doesn't matter who you are. You can make a difference.


Peace.
carly.

My Life is Good
What a very long day! I got to sleep last night a little after 1:00 AM because I'd spent the evening hanging out with friends from Campus Crusade for Christ (or CRU) just chatting up, telling stories, eating, etc. We went to Red Robin and I pigged out because I hadn't had dinner. Of course, I regreted it afterward, but I got a doggy bag and ate the rest of it today. It was good.

Afterwards, we headed to a friend's apartment and just talked about random happenings and other funny things. It was really great. For the longest time, I didn't think I was ever going to get past the high school stage. I dunno what it is--I never thought I'd be "cool" enough to chill with older people. But here I am, the youngest person there, being totally accepted. Not only accepted, but wanted. And I realize now that the great people who are in my life are only in my life because of Jesus. If it weren't for Jesus, I would absolutely NOT be having the most wonderful time just living! I think, that if I didn't have Jesus, I would be a party-goer. Drinking. Smoking. Sex. I think I'd be involved with all of that in one way or another. The thing is, Jesus IS in my life, and I don't have to worry about any of that stuff. Basically, He just tells me, "Enjoy yourself Carly! And enjoy the people I put in your life!" And I do, and I'm happy, and I don't believe it gets any better. Really, I don't! And all the while, Jesus dwells in my heart and I never forget Him and He will never, EVER, forget about me! So many people don't understand, and I feel terrible, because it's so hard to explain! Unless you know Jesus for yourself, He can never really be described accurately. Simply put, He is who He is and He satisfies any void that exists in my life and MORE!

I could probably go on talking about Jesus in novel-quantity, but I won't, because I still have things to discover about Him. It's nice to go into little tangents about Him, though, because it allows me to express my true feelings for Him.

Fly safely,everyone! Peace!
jeffersonair.

It's So Important...
There are so many things that I want to do, I simply don't know where to begin! It's so important to me that I get to Southern California and live with my aunt. It's so important to me that I get into Long Beach Community College for a year and transfer over to UCLA! It's so important to me that my parents don't sell my horse Tuffy while I'm away because I want him to be my daughter's/son's first horse! If it comes down to it, I will bring Tuffy with me and board him somewhere. I dunno how I will make the money, but I am willing to sacrifice whatever possible to keep him! He is the best horse ever! I need to start praying about it more often, though. I realize God knows how important he is to me, but most of the time, I don't exactly show it. So, I really hope that I can make myself worthy of Tuffy, otherwise I know that my parents'll sell him.

Erg... now I'm a little bummed. How unfortunate...

Random Post
I think I am going to spend a day away from school today... That is, after I get home... from school...
See, I only have one class today and after that, I am going to go home and do whatever. Because for the past week, I have been spending most of my time at either my high school or my college! I think I need to give my friends a break from my presence. Not that they don't like me or anything, but I seriously don't wanna get on their nerves. And of course, you know what they'd say, "Oh, Carly! You don't get on our nerves! What are you talking about?" But everybody else out there knows what I mean, right? I know what its like to have a really really good friend get on your nerves, and I seriously don't wanna be one of those people.

Anyways, I gotta beat it. I am on a short break from class and I gots-to-be heading back.

Peace!

In God's Hands and Running Start
Well, pray for me! I have a mid-term in about 1.5 hours in my Political Science 202 class and I don't exactly feel prepared. Honestly, I think that God is going to help me a lot. I was a lot more scared last quarter when I studied a TON than how I do right now, and I've only spent this morning knocking my brain around in my textbooks.

It's kinda nice just thinking that all will be well... everything will be great... God is leading me, so I don't have to worry about a thing... Isn't that nice? Before, I used to obsess over control over my life. I thought if anything was going to happen, it would have to come from me. Now, I don't think that way, and I like it. I like it that my life is in God's control, because if anyone's going to make things right for me, it'd be Him, correct? My life in my hands would definetely be my destruction. Eww... I don't even wanna think about it.

Moving on!

Today has been a good day thus far. I really don't enjoy working for two-hours straight on a subject I don't really care about, but I know that it won't last forever and in the end, I will have passed my class.

Graduation is coming up. For a while, I didn't plan on going. I mean, I'm just going back to school to only graduate once more from college! Why is high school so important? Apparently, it is important to lots of people... not so much me, but my friends and parents. Oh well, I'll go, but only because Leah needs someone to sit with. Honestly, she's got lots of friends, but she's made me feel special, and she has asked me to go because she "needs" someone to sit with. She doesn't want to be alone, and I can't blame her.

Running start has been so great for me. In case you're wondering, running start is a program that allows students who are still in high school to attend college classes for free if they pass a special test. I passed, so I take classes here at community college which is about five minutes away from my high school. How convenient, right? But, yeah, the classes are pretty tough, and I'm glad I haven't really taken on a full load so far. I think I may take one class during the summer just so that I can have something to do. And if I don't, I've promised myself to spend each day of summer wisely and cautiously. I don't want another summer to fly by without me.

Anyways, I'll ask for your prayer. I greatly appreciate it.

Stay peaceful. Pray for the world. It needs it.


carly.

Pray for me! I have an issue!
This is an exerpt from another blog that I have with a friend, but I wanted to post it because it's a huge deal to me right now and I want to be reminded of it constantly, because I really want to change...

"For once, I wish I wasn't the one confessing my feelings for another person. I mean, I really do LOVE to tell people the truth about all the good things I think of them, and of course, the reason I love to do that is because I wish people would tell me the truth in that same way! Do unto others what I would want to have done unto me, right? So I do! I tell people often how great I think they are. I wonder if I do it selfishly, like, underneath all of it. Maybe, in the inner innards of my heart... perhaps I am complimenting people selfishly in hopes that I might get a compliment in return. I mean, I feel like it's a rather innocent issue, but maybe it's there. It's like the whole, "give a gift without expecting anything in return" thing. Maybe I shoud just give people their praise without wanting anything back. And most of the time, it doesn't cross my mind, "Aren't you going to tell me something that's great about me now?" I can't think of any time that that has crossed my mind. But that's why I am saying, maybe it is there hidden in my heart, and maybe that's why I don't feel good about myself most of the time, and maybe that's why I get so discouraged all the time. Maybe that is what is keeping me from the ULTIMATE faith in God! For all I know, my entire relationship with people and with God can come down this whole issue on whether I am truly selfish at heart or not!

... ... yikes, did I just spill over? I know I wrote all that, but part of me can't believe it. I think I needed that and I'm really sorry for going all intense on you. That was a bit much... I think that this has been trying to surface, though... so, thanks, because I think this was a good thing.

Alright, I am gonna go. This is probably going to take you a long time to read.
I'll see you tomorrow. Have a great morning tomorrow."

Yeah, so if there is anyone out there who reads this, I would greatly appreciate any prayer that you may have to offer. It's important to me that I don't have a selfish/prideful heart. I really do want to love people the way Jesus loves them and see them the way He sees them. I don't want there to be any underlying goal when it comes to encouraging or praising others for who they are. I want to benefit them without thinking that it'll come back to me somehow. I truly want to love others more than I love myself and to love God with all my heart.

I appreciate your prayer.
Thanks and in Jesus, I pray that you have peace.
To desire hope, therefore, is to desire Jesus.
carly.

Joing my Church's Mission was an Enlightening Experience
Well, I went to my church "Welcome" class and it was tons of fun. It was kinda interesting, because the only people who signed up were three women/girls, (I am the girl), and we were all at different stages of life. I was the single-childless-still-in-school girl. The second was a married-with-two-young-children-starting-a-career woman. And the third was a divorced-grandmother-who-just-started-coming-to-church-in-April lady. It was very cool to hear all the percpectives about God and stuff, along with chatting it up with Pastors Greg and Dwayne, two way cool guys. I felt really good about what I was doing and Pastor Greg was really impressed with what I had to say. "Very nice comments," he said to me afterward. I'll be perfectly honest with you--all through elementary school and most of junior high, I was all about getting compliments and seeking praise from other people. I loved it! It was my favorite thing; to get compliments from people, especially guys, life could not get any better. But, recently, like at the end of ninth grade, I began to really change. I dunno what happened, but now, when someone compliments me, I can't really say anything. I go blank. I just look at them and desperately try to think of something else to say so that I can change the subject! How weird is that? So when Pastor Greg commended me for the things that I said, all I could reply was a shy chuckle and the word, "yeah..." It's like I can't say thank you anymore because I feel like whatever they are praising me for is false and couldn't possibly be real. They must be trying to be nice or something...That's what often goes through my head.

But yeah, once again, I am ranting and I am trying to think of cool things to say, but failing miserably. School tomorrow. How exciting! Yet unfortunate because I can't hang out with my friend after first period at the high school. I gotta go straight to college afterward, but that's cool because I really like the class that I go to--Writing Short Stories. Fun, right? It really is, and the first story I wrote was liked very much by my workshop classmates. They were very supportive.

So, anyways, I should probably go. I am having kinda a mellow day today and I am starting to enjoy blogger again. For a while, I didn't really enjoy it so much, but now, I am "digging" it. Cool deal...

Peace!

*intercom static... more intercom static...*
*Captian blows a rasberry into the microphone*
jeffersonair.

Spider-man Rules!
Wow... I went to see Spider-man tonight with my little brother and it was amazing! I loved it! Of course, I could go without the bad guy, but then where would all the conflict go? But this movie had everything that satisfied my movie-going tastebuds. It had extreme action, unlike and far better than any batman/superman lover enjoys. The character he played was respectable and absolutely fun! Then of course, it had just the right amount of romance/intimacy. I don't like movies that have intense love scenes because I think it promotes immoral standards. Why are so many people, younger and younger in age, getting STD's, not to mention, broken hearts and babies?! I know, I'm the serious conservative, but I am proud of it. So yeah, basically, he just kisses her. Simple as that. He kisses the girl, and it was enough. I don't see anything wrong with holding hands or some kissing. (Making out is yet another matter.) But to kiss and go? What's more romantic than that? Of course, there is always a down side. After seeing a made-up character do all these amazing things and the way he goes about winning the girl's heart over makes me wish that sort of thing would happen to me. Of course, I know a man that shoots spider-web from his wrists and wears funky looking spandex isn't exactly going to swoop through my window and leave me speechless. But the fact that he kissed her was enough for me to become all ooey-gooey inside and wish I was with somebody else, rather than my little brother who constantly interrupts my movie-watching experience with the words "the end" at all the wrong points of the movie.

All in all, it was awesome, and I really wanna see it again! It was really cool! Superman and Batman, but maybe not the X-Men, cannot compare to the story of Spider-man.


Peace, everyone.

Random Jibberish and other Great Things
What a boring day! This is terrible! Yesterday was so great! Then, today came! What happened?!
This is seriously ridiculous. I am sitting here at my desk, resting my chin upon a bottle of Diet Coke, trying to think of ANYTHING that I can do...

My brother spent the night at a birthday party last night, and I really wish he would come home so that we can go ride our bikes or go to see a movie or just irritate each other without limits. Can you tell I miss that kid? Well, you're right, because I totally do.

My parents have gone to teach their dog obedience class. My family own their own business, and a lot of the time, I am called upon to be "employee," even when I never offered to get hired. I think it's that way for a lot of kids my age with parents who own a business. And sometimes, we don't get paid because we're their children--they pay for everything else in our lives, why should they have to pay us for working for them, right? I dunno whether that's right or not, but most of the time, I wish I got paid! I'm not resentful to my parents, though, not in the least measurement. I love my parents because they trust me and they let me stay out really late and they DO pay for a lot of the things I do.

Speaking of things I've done! I need to mention that, finally, after years of battling it out with God, I've committed to sponsoring a child from Compassion International! His name is Karanganwa and he is 11 years old. He lives in Africa in the country Rwanda. When I went to the website to seek out a kid, I didn't know exactly how I was going to choose. I didn't really know if I wanted a boy or a girl, how old I wanted them to be, or where they should be from. So, as I saw all the pictures, I just thought to myself, Adopt them all! They're all so beautiful! But of course, I knew I couldn't, so I finally asked for God's divine intervention on my choice! And He did it! He found him! I saw his picture, and I saw his smile, and then, when I saw where he was from, I knew! Last quarter, in my Political Science 101 class, we did this mass research on Rwanda and all the sufferings that occurred there throughout the 1990s! It was devestating! So, when I saw that he was from Rwanda and that he doesn't have a father anymore, (likely one of the many, many, many men slaughtered during their civil war), I signed up to sponsor him! I am so excited to receive my Compassion packet! I want to write him letters and send him pictures and ask him questions and tell him how beautiful he is! I am so excited about him, I've been telling everyone about him!

So, yeah, I am still really bored, but for a moment there, I was really entertained! Whenever I think of Karanganwa, my heart kinda jumps because I'm already beginning to love him so much. I think that's a Jesus thing because I know that I can do NOTHING without Christ and that includes the ability to love somebody else. I'm really happy that I'm going to be a part of his life.


*Intercom static...
"Hello, everybody! This is your Captain speaking. We've just welcomed another passenger on the plane. Please accept him with open hearts. His name is Karanganwa and he desperately seeks love and support from all of you. Please pray for him. Thank you, and thanks for flying with jeffersonair."
End transmission.

What a crazy day I've had. I spent the whole day at my high school, which, for me, is very odd because the only class I have there is first period! I just didn't wanna go home and sit in my living room thinking about all the possible things that I could do when I already had the opportunity to hang out with a really great new person I've recently met! Then again, I gotta consider myself pretty lucky, because basically, I get to have a three-day-weekend every week. So, really, I shouldn't complain about how BORED I get when I have tons of time to use however I want to use them!

Anyways, it really was a great day and I was reminded how much God loves all His children and blesses them with new friendships so often. It's been a great way to start my weekend, but now, I'm looking forward to what happens when Monday comes back around.

So, world, stay safe out there and may God bless you like He has done for me! Be good!


jeffersonair.
End transmission.

What's up? I'm here chilling in the computer section at my community college and I am mass bored! I got kicked out of my Writing Short Stories class because I didn't read last night's homework. It was really stupid of me, I know, but I forgot. I was busy hanging out with some friends at a park. I played football and I made two touchdowns, (go me!), and this morning, I was so sore from the game last night that I had difficulties lifting my leg up to put it on the break peddle in my car! I was very sore. But at least I made two touchdowns! Against a giant group of guys too! It was great! I was fierce!

There is a great word: Fierce. Wow. I need to start using that more often.

Can you tell that I am in a very funky mood? I am trying to cheer myself up for being kicked out of class. The things is, I really like that class and I feel like it's going to greatly effect my future major, which is likely Screenwriting, and to get kicked out for something as silly as "not reading the story" kinda bums me out. Leah, my bestest friend, did read the homework and she is in there now, without me, with the remainder of the class that didn't get kicked out which adds up to about 10-12 people out of a 30 or so people in the class total. I am glad that I was not the only one who got dismissed from class. However, not doing the homework, and looking like a fool, isn't exactly the best way to promote Christ and what He stands for. I gotta start doing better.

Starting today, May 1, I am going on a TV fast. I made that committment at Aquire the Fire this last weekend. Ron Luce, the host, made me realize how much little time the average Christian actually spends diving into God's Word, seeking to further their relationship with Him, and how much more time the average Christian spends soaking up the TV and letting the world's media raise them the way the world wants to see them raised. We need to be different. As Christians, we are not apart of this world, but instead, members of God's Kingdom, and therefore, should not adore worldly things or comfort ourselves with worldly desires. Instead, as Christians that trully want to follow God, we much remind each other that this world is only the Waiting Room for what is to come! Nothing here will ever last and nothing here will we ever be able to take with us into the Gates of Heaven, so why care? I'm not saying become a slug! Far from it--I just think that we need to force God into slot # 1 on our priority lists, then, everything else won't be as life-consuming or mind-deteriorating. Aquire the Fire was a very good thing for many of the people who went this year. I honestly hope that the majority of people who went down for the alter call were genuinely seeking Christ in their lives. I ask God to bless them and lead them down the right path.

Anyways, I realize I don't write as often, and maybe it's because my life hasn't really been particularly interesting recently. However, I am still here, and I will try to write more often, (especially more than once a month), and I hope all your lives are God-centered and Jesus-loving and I pray that God will keep you all safe.

Peace.
End transmission.